Its the day, 3 years ago when i first asked someone if i could love her. If one day i would grow old and still love her. That day was the day i felt i could live again, that rainbows were real and sunsets were beautiful. I know that making this day a special day is stupid after almost a year but i know also that she was the one, the one that broke me and put me back together. I loved her and love her still. Shes was like the sky to me and when the sky fell, i was crushed by its weight. If wei were still together, it'd make today 3 years and i would be happy. Now i'm not and this post is to celebrate what we had and what i still hold. this post is to tell you that i loved u, and i will love you every time i think of u and i think of you alot. the story begins with a night...
A night filled with stars and adrenaline of a 19 year old boy. As i remember, you were beautiful. I was starstruck. I was amazed that someone so beautiful could want to sleep next to me, talk to me, be my friend. You were funny, cute and the most lovable person that god ever made. You were a genius, u played your cards so well. I fell right into your trap. In the following weeks, i was in a limbo of bliss and fear. Fear that you would never say yes and blissful when in ur presence. I loved u the moment u appeared in any situation. On that night the 28th of September sitting on a bench that i carefully and romantically placed in my garden, i asked you if u could give me a chance to love you and you said " remember that eyes joke u told me, well take the last three letters." I was utterly and in total disbelief that i had courted such a beautiful girl and how i loved her. Everyday from that day i had loved her no less than 200% and i showed it so well. We had names for each other i would call her wifey and she would call me hubby. Kitty kat, bugsy, love, honey sooooo many more. I love her because she gave me life, and she kept me strong, she put up with my shit and she gave me hope, she told i was perfect when i thought that she was. She loved me so much. Today i'm not going to talk about the break up, i'm going to talk about the life and not the death. She was everything to me, and in some ways she still is. It breaks my heart everytime her friends tell me how badly her current beau treats her and i want to teach him how to do it, i want to sweep her off her feet again....but i cant. I dont talk to her now, because i love her and i dont want any miscommunication and politics with her beau so i dont talk to her. I've seen sunsets and sunrises but nothing of the beauty that your face beholds. I miss you like the sun misses the flower, like the sun misses the flower in the depths of winter, instead of beauty to direct its light to, the heart hardens like the frozen world you absence that u've banished me to. The little broken pieces of my heart are so small that they could fit into the eye of a needle. To finish this, hope...love should end with hope, hope guides me thru the days and especially the nights that i am without u, the hope that when u are gone from my sight it would not be the last time i shall look upon u.
with all the love that i possess,
i remain yours.
Ken.
